Dating in Brazil: The Beach Test

Dating isn’t easy, is it ladies. It should be. It should be a whole lot of fun, but certain rules and customs can make it…suck. One of my least favorite would have to be the Brazil’s famous “beach test.” This is basically a chance for a guy to rate and judge your body.

Typically, this is how it works. If you meet a guy during the evening on let’s say a Friday night and you two have good conversation, a few laughs, and generally a good time, he’ll then invite you to go out to the beach the next day. The naive girl in me says “oh yes, that sounds like fun. I love the beach.” But sand castles, and water sports are the last thing on the guy’s mind. The beach test is simply a way for a guy to see and judge your “curves.” If he likes what you sees, he’ll take you out that night or the next day; but if not, you probably won’t hear from him again.

Not only is this test completely shallow, it’s also degrading. A woman should not have to be downsized to how she sports her bikini to be considered worthy of dating. What is truly pathetic about this test (in addition to everything else) is that most guys won’t ask you to the beach unless they already kind of like you anyway. Thus, a woman may be as charming as ever and a guy can decide that mentally and emotionally he likes her, but because her butt isn’t a perfect 10 in his books, he won’t date her…seriously?

Any woman who has ever been on a date already feels vulnerable and under pressure to look good and be impressive; the last thing she needs is for some guy to “test” whether or not he thinks she’s sexually desirable.

Brazilian women joke that winter is a better time to meet guys, because you have an excuse to avoid the “beach test.” Others suggest bringing a wrap or something that will cover you up. I say skip the beach all together. If he really wants to get to know you better, let him take you to one of the many lovely places in Brazil where you won’t feel like a contestant on a beauty pageant.



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